All photos by AJF Photography

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Sydney University’s flying winger Henry Clunies-Ross takes us through his side’s matchday squad for today’s Colin Caird Shield grand final showdown against Eastern Suburbs…

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1. TOM OSBORNE: Ozzy, as he is more commonly known, helps to erase the public perception of props being dumb and ugly. This fine young scholar takes the crown for the smartest in the 2nd Grade side, which is no mean feat considering who is at 13. He is fluent in Mandarin, and currently studying a Commerce Law Hons. It is rumoured that he is often found holding a 200kg squat, whilst simultaneously studying his advance economics textbook.

2. BEN CAROLAN: ‘Caz Man’ or the ‘Caz Bot’ is another front-rower changing perceptions. His slender frame and exhilarating pace make him ideal for the wing, which is where you might find him during the match. Caz is a full-time PE teacher and prides himself on developing the next generation of hookers in Australia. Try’s and Caz go hand-in-hand, and word has it he is running for Club Captain next year.

3. WAYNE BORSAK: ‘Big One Yay’ (Wayne like Kayne), is changing no perceptions. He, in all his glory, is the perfect and magnificent image of a prop. With the biggest squat in the club, Wayne is an imposing figure and experienced head amongst the group. Wayne has many 1st Grade games to his name, and possesses skills better than most backs. Wayne loves food, beer and scrummaging.

4. RORY SUTTOR: ‘Worwy’ Suttor is a beast of a human. A full-time landscaper, it is said that he once mowed a full size rugby field by ripping out each blade of grass with his teeth. He cares little for his body, and is the wrong person to run a short ball at. A very intellectual man, he loves engaging in slow conversations with Nick Champion de Crespigny about topics too complicated for most.

5. NICK COALDRAKE: Standing at 204cm Drake is tall timber, and another forward who possesses silky skills. He can fend you when your five metres away, and charge down a kick with ease. A self-confessed gym junkie, Nick adds a lot to both the scrum and lineout. Some junior years as an Aussie rules player, has also allowed ‘Drake’ to take the odd specky, or 60m drop punt. Second-rowers don’t come much better than this.

6. WILL COCKER: Big Villy is the oldest in the team, and probably the toughest. Each of the shiny silver hairs that grow amongst his dark luscious mullet, represent someone that his shoulders have bent in half. I’m careful what I say to Vil, because I am scared he might eat me. Big Cocker adds a lot of punch to the forward pack, and a wealth of Tongan heart and experience.

7. HUGH SUMMERHAYES: A genuine on-ball back rower, Hughey is another regular in 1st Grade, which is a true testament to his talent as a footballer. His speed and ability to break a tackle makes him a weapon in attack, and his strength and work ethic in defence means he’s the ultimate back rower. An invaluable member of the team, I’m glad I’m playing with him and not against.

8. JACK McCALMAN (c):‘Mad Dog’ by name, mad dog by nature. Our inspirational leader doesn’t take a backward step, and commands the utmost of respect from all who play with him. He has led many successful campaigns in the Uni jersey and is the ultimate clubman. With rugby in his blood, Jack is a future stalwart of the club

9. BANJO TRAVERS: Striking a strong resemblance to former ‘The Bachelor’ Matty J, Banjo Travers is who all men want to be, and all women want to be with. His cute but handsome looks, soft but chiselled features, are what dreams are made of. It’s just a pity he’s 5ft 2in. Behind Wallabies Nick Phipps and Jake Gordon in 1st Grade, Banjo is an extremely talented halfback with a bright future. His instinctive play, genuine speed, and rocket pass, are but a few of his many strengths.

10. CONNOR O’SHEA: Another player with a wealth of 1st Gade experience, ‘Cozy’ is tasked with steering the ship that is 2nd Grade. With his frontal lobe having finally developed in the last two years, Con has blossomed into one of the most dangerous no.10’s in Australian Rugby. His vision, knowledge of the game, and skills are unmatched. He works hard and enjoys a well-earned lemonade after the game. He doesn’t like being alone on a Sunday, and can often be found in Europe, or hanging out with friends in the library.

11. WILL TERRY: ‘Terry Tough see you next tuesday’ is the future of wingers. Tall, fast and powerful, he is the doppelganger of Wallaby Reece Hodge. Tezza loves a high ball and a bit of open space. He’s a man of few words, but when you look deep into his eyes you know he’s good for it. Look for Tez to receive some wicked offloads from his 13, and run the length to score.

12. OFA MANUOFETOA: At 111kg of rippling muscle, do I need to say anything else? I don’t know what big ‘Of’ eats, but it works and I need some. Born in New Zealand, Ofa is in his first year at the club, and still being colts eligible he will undoubtedly be a serious force in the future. A bloody specimen that I’m excited to watch, and be a part of Ofa’s growth in the game. Australian rugby take note!

13. HENRY CLUNIES-ROSS: Me? ‘Two Dad’s’ doesn’t offer much. Big bench press but that’s about it…

14. SEPESA LOGA-TAROGI: Possessing skills and speed reminiscent of his idol, the great Rupeni Caucaunibuca, ‘Pes’ has been a great addition to the club this year. He’s the smiling assassin, always happy off the field but ready to do damage when he’s on it. Of Fijian heritage, ‘Pes’ really feels the cold, wearing a full tracksuit for every training session this year.

15. NATHANIEL TAMWOY: ‘Nutsy’ is faaaast! He’s really fast. He’s so fast he makes fast people look not fast. An incredible story of determination, Nathaniel has developed his game from having never played a few years ago, to being one of the best finishers going around. He is a genuine athlete and only last week, during the semi, flexed too hard and ripped his sleeve clean off his jersey. Incredible

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PHOTOS TO FOLLOW!!